David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an obscenity. Those...
A teacher asks her class if anyone can use the word fascinate in a sentence. Brian raises his hand and says, “The sky is fascinating.” The...
The doctor said, “Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very...
A businessman is hurrying home on the motorway after a hard days work when he is stopped by a policeman. “Do you know you were driving...
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed...
The librarian handed the chicken a book and the bird left. Ten minutes later, the chicken returned, tossed the book on the desk and said: ‘book,...
Eliza says to the other two, “You know girls, my husband bought me the most wonderful jewelry for our anniversary A lavish diamond necklace and some...
An old French lady had a small shop in her village for years until one day a huge corporate supermarket set up across the road from...
A man celebrating his 100th birthday was asked by a reporter how he had managed to live so long: The man contemplated that question and looked...
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose A young student nurse appears and gives...
It was about a month ago when a woman in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest. “Forgive me Father, for...
Wanda’s dishwasher quit working so she called in a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave...
Buddha was sitting under the tree with his students A man comes and he spits at Buddha He wipes up his face then he asks him,...
One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son...
A foursome of senior golfers hit the course with waning enthusiasm for the sport. “These hills are getting steeper as the years go by,” one complained....
Jacob age 85, and Rebecca age 79 are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and...
She parks in front of the bank and goes inside where she is greeted by a banker. “Hi, Sir I would like to take out a...
Nasreddin Hodja was lying in the shade of an ancient walnut tree. His body was at rest, but, befitting his calling as an imam, his mind...
As he desperately tried to free himself, another jogger came by. “Help!” The man called out to the other jogger. “Please help me get out of...
At school, a kid told him that if he wanted to earn money from everybody around him, all he had to say was “I know the...